My Dearest reader, I pray this letter finds you well. Most of all may you feel seen by the time you reach the end. This is a letter to the woman who feels unseen.
I myself know all to well what you could be feeling. Let me take you on a ride down memory lane.
I was born in the Dominican Republic, at a very young age my father left my mother and she was now a single mother to 3 children.
Times were hard then and it was a struggle for her, not long after she also left to come to the United States in search of a better life for us.
I was only 3 years old when this happened, we remained back in our country with a woman she believed she could trust.
Now that is a story that holds much weight and we’ll save it for another time.
The reason I mentioned this to you dear one is because I now recognize it was in this part of my life where rejection came in.
It was in this time that a critical portion of my childhood was distorted.
I experienced some very traumatic things, with so much confusion the identity I was creating was being based off of unhealthy experiences.
Eventually I was able to come to the United States, and just for a while life was great.
I still had very little contact with my father. Life went on and many things began to change.
As I grew I craved a love to fill the empty void inside my heart.
I craved to love deeply at the cost of a false love of the world.
Now with a small amount of background let’s come back to life presently.
I have spent a lifetime trying to understand who I am, and the reality is we will always be growing in understanding our identity.
My past was something that led to me look for my identity from the things of the world.
But you cannot look for your identify in a world that’s full of sin and imperfections.
True Love
Can I tell you about the moment I found true love, the love my heart and spirit craved.
My young adult life was difficult and I experienced different worldly relationships, until I reached rock bottom…
In the time where my spirit, soul, and flesh were all fed up, life felt so empty and dark.
I was determined for change and felt that it was now or never to see if God really existed.
2 months later; after a physical altercation with that individual that I was in a relationship with, it all broke and shattered right before me.
This was it….
Life in the moment felt like it was ending, little did I know it was just beginning.
Instantly the next day my walk with God began, I guess we can call it a radical experience.
Since then I have never looked back….
Facing the Truth
You see a relationship with God is like finally feeling a full heart, it’s knowing everything you were, are and will be. It’s love, it’s truth, it’s identity. It is living in purpose.
God does not only redeem and restore but most importantly he heals. Through healing he reveals the deepest wounds we carry.
One of those wounds for me was feeling rejected, unseen and as if I was meaningless.
The truth is in the beginning of the walk with him I felt that he would hide me and I felt more meaningless then ever.
Now at first I won’t lie, I didn’t handle it very well. I felt hurt and confused. I cried out to God not understanding why he was doing this.
When I finally let him in and began to listen I received the revelation.
The truth is I was giving too much attention to the wrong things. I was more focused on being seen by a person rather then growing deeper in the spirit.
I was placing God in a box expecting him to be like everyone that hurt me.
Those very walls of pain is what he used to bring me closer to him. The more he revealed the more I hurt yet I knew I needed him to overcome.
God Sees You
Beloved child of God I know that sometimes or many times we feel confused of who we are and where we are going.
I know it can be hard to not fall to the weaknesses of the world.
The world teaches to be dependent of others recognition and in turn it also teaches to depend solely on yourself.
Either one leads to nothing.
You see we were not created to do this life alone, but not with the hands of others who also carry weaknesses, rather depending on the one who created you.
Jeremiah 1:5 NIV
“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.”
You need to understand just how special and precious you are to God.
See God knows your thoughts, your heart and your desires. He wants to help you but you have to let him in.
Feeling unseen and rejected is a reflection of how we truly see ourselves.
What I mean by that is, there is a part of you that is struggling with seeing yourself as worthy of the things you feel hidden in.
The truth is deep down when we feel this way we are expecting that very rejection, rather than the recognition or acknowledgment we say we desire.
God wants us to turn our eyes to him. In order to grow stronger in the spirit our eyes cannot be facing the things of the world.
Accepting Jesus into your heart means choosing daily to die to your freshly desires. It means to say no to the weakness that want to hold you back.
It means to stand bold in the spirit and tell the enemy NO and GET OUT.
Often times it is the enemy himself whispering in your ears that God doesn’t care about just like the people in the world.
His purpose in this is to always keep you in the same place of despair, keeping God small in a box.
God is bigger and greater than any thing you could be facing.
The truth is the only answer to overcome this is to seek Jesus with all your might.
Woman of God, say yes to growing in relationship with God. Through your yes God will heal those wounds.
Gods will for our life’s is to live in the freedom that he has given us. To live a life filled with is heavenly purpose for us.
When we feel rejected by God it reflects a lack of intimacy with him.
Matthew 6:33 NIV
But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.
Most importantly know that God knows exactly what your going through, and he wants to love you and lead you through this difficult time in your life.
Lean in closer and see the beauty of who you are through Gods eyes.
Keep asking and you will receive. Keep on seeking and you will find. Keep knocking and the doors will be opened for you.
XOXO
While here you may enjoy my recent blog!
